a nervous tick-motion

The heart is such a delicate muscle. Mine has been hurting for a few days. To compensate for the ache, I have taken in a few movies:

Grosse Point Blank (thanks Josh for recommending it)
Team America (don't ask...)
Kinsey

Also saw Andrew Bird at Second Story Saturday night. When people describe me as intense, I wonder if they have ever seen this guy. I mean, he is intense to the point where his obsession with music would make it extremely difficult to have a conversation with him (I am only speculating). You could see his devout passion as he played--even as he talked about playing. Inspiring. I left on such a high.

I hung around the studio, sat in on the Bomb Diggidty show with Sarah--afterwards, I picked up The Mountain Goats new cd.


This evening Lilly and I left the apartment, greeted by lovely Indiana skies-it was humid and hot but the sun was out. Within ten minutes of driving from 2nd to the park we were caught in a huge downpour. Through the storm clouds, a bright rainbow appeared. I stood in the empty parking lot with Lilly in my arms, rain pummeling us from all sides and we laughed (and then she cried, as I put her back in the car seat). By the time we arrived back home, not ten minutes later, the rain had stopped and the sun was breaking through the clouds. Steam was rising.

Too much change for me at once-I think that is the problem. It's just too much. I know I cannot control what happens or why it happens. I just wish it didn't affect me so.

A great quote from Grosse Point Blank-- "If you love something, set it free. If it comes back to you--it's broken." One way to look at it, I suppose.