Shadow in my heart
Is tearing me apart
Or maybe it's just something
In my stars
There's a hole
In my life
There's a hole
In my life
Be a happy man
I try the best I can
Or maybe I'm just looking
For too much
"hole in my life"
Police
Pulled out this old album today. one of my favorites.
got me through tough times.
feeling grumpy as of late. think it has something to do with january.
october-january-april
are shit months for me.
soooooooobeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehaaaaappppppppyyyyyyyyyyyy.
ptttthht!
1/26/2008
1/21/2008
musings
I don’t wanna waste your time
With music you don’t need
Why should I autograph the book
That you won’t even read
I’ve got a different scar for every song
And blood left still to bleed
But I don’t wanna waste your time
With music you don’t need
I don’t wanna waste good wine
If you won’t stick around
I love to laugh but I’m more than just
Your alcoholic clown
I won’t pray this prayer with you
Unless we both kneel down
I don’t wanna waste good wine
If you won’t stick around
Come on lighten up
Let me fill your cup
I’m just trying to imagine a situation
Where we might have a real conversation
But I don’t wanna waste the words
That you don’t seem to need
When it comes to wanting what’s real
There’s no such thing as greed
I hope this night puts down deep roots
I hope we plant a seed
‘Cause I don’t wanna waste your time
With music you don’t need
"don't want to waste your time"
Over The Rhine
Trumpet Child
Well, it's 2008. Happy 2008.
It's been awhile.
No new resolutions I want to share.
Not feeling like sharing much these days,
I don't play well with others,
And I have been known to run with scissors.
The town has been a little down since Evan left us. I didn't go to the gatherings but had every intention to do so. Something about January just takes the motivation right out of me.
Lately I have been feeling down about hurting other people. I feel sad that I have hurt others in a way they have to heal and grieve and mourn and start over again. I don't like that.
Been thinking about the people who have hurt me too. The pain has subsided, but you know, the scars are still there. Some irrepairable damage done too. Paralyzing in fact. And each time it happens, I become less caring, less willing, less open to possibility--more jaded and guarded.
And still, I don't like the fact that I am getting older and am by myself. There are times when having someone around would make a difference. I often feel unprotected and frightened. And no amount of self-defense -- physical or mental-- will do in those situations.
There are things I want to do but find that doing them solo is just-not-quite-the-same- I dunno.
Emotional attachment is a sticky thing. Is it worth the hassle? Is it worth the risk of knowing that person too might leave? Or to realise they are not for you and have to inflict that sort of loss on someone else?
I resign myself.
With music you don’t need
Why should I autograph the book
That you won’t even read
I’ve got a different scar for every song
And blood left still to bleed
But I don’t wanna waste your time
With music you don’t need
I don’t wanna waste good wine
If you won’t stick around
I love to laugh but I’m more than just
Your alcoholic clown
I won’t pray this prayer with you
Unless we both kneel down
I don’t wanna waste good wine
If you won’t stick around
Come on lighten up
Let me fill your cup
I’m just trying to imagine a situation
Where we might have a real conversation
But I don’t wanna waste the words
That you don’t seem to need
When it comes to wanting what’s real
There’s no such thing as greed
I hope this night puts down deep roots
I hope we plant a seed
‘Cause I don’t wanna waste your time
With music you don’t need
"don't want to waste your time"
Over The Rhine
Trumpet Child
Well, it's 2008. Happy 2008.
It's been awhile.
No new resolutions I want to share.
Not feeling like sharing much these days,
I don't play well with others,
And I have been known to run with scissors.
The town has been a little down since Evan left us. I didn't go to the gatherings but had every intention to do so. Something about January just takes the motivation right out of me.
Lately I have been feeling down about hurting other people. I feel sad that I have hurt others in a way they have to heal and grieve and mourn and start over again. I don't like that.
Been thinking about the people who have hurt me too. The pain has subsided, but you know, the scars are still there. Some irrepairable damage done too. Paralyzing in fact. And each time it happens, I become less caring, less willing, less open to possibility--more jaded and guarded.
And still, I don't like the fact that I am getting older and am by myself. There are times when having someone around would make a difference. I often feel unprotected and frightened. And no amount of self-defense -- physical or mental-- will do in those situations.
There are things I want to do but find that doing them solo is just-not-quite-the-same- I dunno.
Emotional attachment is a sticky thing. Is it worth the hassle? Is it worth the risk of knowing that person too might leave? Or to realise they are not for you and have to inflict that sort of loss on someone else?
I resign myself.
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