"I’ve Lost Track of the World"

Holiday specials:
*My oldest and dearest friend called me up and before even saying hello, she said, "o.k. spill it sister...new address, new phone number, what in the hell is going on? I want details. NOW."
The last time we spoke was over 2 years ago.
Damn, I love real people. Happy 35 to you too, Erin.

*Feeling victorious at winning the battle over the snowdrifts, I drove into town to check out how my new car handled unplowed streets-- only to find our county was under a snow emergency. I watched some kids drive their crappy car THROUGH a mile high snowbank and then proceeded to spin out into the unpaved Kroger parking lot. They were laughing their asses off--probably more at me and my stunned expression than anything else. Ahh youth, glorious youth.

*My daughter's inability to comprehend the whole gift-giving scene. She wanted kisses, not presents. We left half of them unopened--and using the small trunk for an excuse, left most of them at grandma's house. My parting sentiments were, "I just don't have room for all of this stuff. And if dad tries to but that box in view of my back window and I have an accident..." Driving home I called and apologized. Just spending a few hours with them turns me back into the silent but raging beast of my youth. It's more fun watching my sisters quibble for mom's attention anyway.

* Watching old episodes of Benny Hill after a few drinks. Fun for the whole fucking family.

*THIS MOVIE. What a hoot.